Article Many people think that if they achieve happiness once they'll be happy forever but that is simply not true. 0 2022 Life coaching Wellness coaching life coaching Lifecoachhub Pty Ltd LifeCoachHub

Happiness is a Choice not a Result (It Takes Work)

TAGS: coaching, life coaching, business coaching, coach, life coach, self help, personal development happiness, hard work, choice, self love, awareness, happy goals

Happiness is a choice quote

Yes, Happiness Takes Work

There’s an old Confuscious saying that I’m sure many of you have heard: “Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.” It’s a nice sounding quote and it is what we all dream of.

But has that ever actually happened to anyone? I’m guessing no. Jobs come with ups and downs just like life does. I for one happen to be one of those insanely lucky people who love life, but that doesn’t mean that I can just stop working at it.

Many people have the belief that if they achieve something important to them they will be happy for the rest of their days without having to put any more work into it. This goal could be anything. It could be getting a job, a promotion, a spouse, a kid; the possibilities are endless.

And I’m not saying that achieving these goals won’t make you happy. They can definitely bring you a lot of happiness. But there’s no end point in life where you’ve scored enough happiness points that you’ll never have to work another day at it. But is that so terrible?

Sometimes I like to imagine what I would do if I was a billionaire and one of my ideas was to open up a happiness research lab. This lab would figure out a way for people to be happy simply by taking supplements. I wanted to crack the code to happiness so that everyone could be as happy as me. But even in my imagination this never worked out. 

Making everyone have a healthy brain would make a significant difference in happiness around the world because having a healthy brain is the first step. But it’s not enough on its own.

There are so many people out there that have perfectly healthy brains, but never put any work into being happy and thus stay miserable. Happiness is not something that can be given, but something that must be achieved over and over again.


Happiness is continuous

I realize that this notion might make you feel scared. We’re taught in our society that if we can achieve enough we will be happy for the rest of our lives. But even if we do have many things in our lives to make us happy we still have to work at being grateful for them.

We also still have to work at achieving more happy things because over time we will get bored with what we have and will require new things to make us happy. (To clarify, when I say “things” I don’t necessarily mean material things but just anything that could make us happy.

This includes family, friends, and hobbies.) Now, I must admit that does sound exhausting. And it can be. But the happiness we can derive from hard work at it will be very much worth it.

Allow me to explain by using myself as an example. 2 years ago I was a very unhappy person, I had dealt with mental illness for years and was finally on the right treatment plan which allowed me to no longer be depressed.

But it didn’t make me happy.

However, since I was no longer depressed I had some energy so I decided to put that energy to work by working at achieving happiness.  

Over time I joined different social groups, in order to make friends and have a sense of community, by being more open to new experiences. I joined a church where people were from different backgrounds than me. At first it did take some effort to get used to but over time I came to love it because I met so many interesting people who were all very loving towards me.

A few months later I joined a group for adults with high functioning autism.  I have high functioning autism and at first really did not want to join the group because I felt that I didn’t want to be identified in that way. But with hard work, I overcame that fear and now I am so grateful for all of the friends I have made through the group.

Later, I worked on being happier during my alone time by exercising and doing meditation. It took me a while, but eventually I got to the point where I was walking for 2 hours a day and meditating almost every day.

And to this day I’m still working on adding things to my life to increase happiness. I recently became happier by taking more time to be grateful.  And I must admit: working towards happiness is fun!

happiness is a choice

No one on this planet is happy every second of every day so we could all potentially become happier. There is no maximum level of happiness (at least that has been achieved).

But even if you have achieved a high level you still have to put in the work to stay there. If humans were capable of staying happy forever then they would stop working altogether and society would fall apart.

There have been studies on rats that show that if the rat has the option of pushing a lever that will trigger happy chemicals in its brain it will continue to press the lever until it starves to death.

So it’s a good thing that happiness requires work. Your life may not be a life where you don’t have to work a day in your life, but it can still be a life you love.

Rachel Alison Kaplan, Life Coach



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