Article Three reasons why your life is stuck in neutral 0 2018 Life coaching https://www.lifecoachhub.com/img/uploads/articles/thumbs/982_1528746667.jpg NLP coaching life coaching Lifecoachhub Pty Ltd LifeCoachHub
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The Real Reasons Why You're Not Successful

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TAGS: coaching, life coaching, business coaching, coach, life coach, self help, personal development NLP, relationships, business, success, responsibility, ownership, accountability, life, adult, potential, strength, motivation, investment, successful, career, goals

People who never take responsibility

You don't write down your goals

I'm not talking about your New Years Resolutions here. I'm talking about getting out a sheet of paper no matter if it's January or July, and writing down your goals. People who write down their goals are 80% more successful than those who don't write them down.  

When you're writing down your goals, be very specific! Don't just say you want to make "more" money. Technically, if you make just one dollar more than you made last year, that's "more" money. 

What specific amount of money do you want? Instead of writing that your goal is to make six figures by next year, write down that you want to make $100k, 200k, or whatever amount you have in mind. 

Don't be afraid to dream big when it comes to your goals. If you really want to make over one million dollars a year, don't write down that you want to make $100k a year because it sounds more realistic.  

There are plenty of people out there making well over six figures a year, and I guarantee those people are no smarter than you are. The only difference is those people took action to reach their goals, and you haven't.

After you write down the exact goal, put a deadline on your goal. For example, write down that you want to make $100k by December 31st, 2018. A goal without a deadline is just a dream.   

  • What if your boss asked you to complete a project, but didn't give you a deadline for its completion?
  • How long would it take you to finish? About 5% of you would probably bust your ass to get it done, but most of you probably won't ever complete the project.   
  • Ever notice when you have a deadline of 2 weeks or 2 months to finish something, it takes you that exact amount of time to complete it?

Putting a date on your goal will make this something concrete in your mind, and it will also fuel your fire to make it happen. 

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you don't know how you can meet your goals

Now, it's time to put some emotion behind your goal.  After you have a deadline on your goal, start to think of the great things that can happen once you've met your goal.

  • If your goal is to make more money, what will you do with that money?
  • Will you pay off your student loans, upgrade your living situation, or take your kids on a trip? 
  • Do you want to make enough money so your spouse doesn't have to work anymore? 
  • Maybe your goal is to complete your degree so your mom can finally watch you walk across that stage.

Whatever reason you may have for wanting your goal, be sure to write those down. 

Emotion is the secret sauce that will kick your success into high gear.

You don't take responsibility for your actions

This is a big one. People who never take responsibility for their actions will never be successful.   

I repeat.

If you don't take responsibility for the results you've gotten out of life due to YOUR actions, you will NEVER be successful. We all know someone who enters failed relationship after failed relationship, and always has some type of drama going on in their lives.   

After each failed relationship, they tell you some story of woe and despair about how the other person "did them wrong", or how the other person was an asshole. 

I've had both men and women come to me for coaching, telling me how they keep ending up with liars, cheaters, assholes, etc. Unfortunately, I have to tell these people the bitter truth. 

They're the ones who chose to date these people.

  • If you're working in a job paying shitty wages, YOU'RE the one who agreed to work there.
  • If you're complaining about being in debt up to your eyeballs, you're the one who chose to spend money you didn't have.

People who think this way choose to think that life just HAPPENS to them, and they never realize that they are responsible for what happens in their life.

  • Once you take accountability for your actions, this is a game changer.
  • Once you realize that YOU'RE responsible for the results in your life, you should also realize that you're the only one who can change things. 

All of this may sound harsh, but look at it this way.  Now that you know you're responsible for the results of your life, it should also come as a relief that you can also change things for the better. 

Instead of thinking that you have to wait for your boss to give you a raise, you should now feel empowered to go out and get a higher-paying job instead of sitting around waiting on someone else to do something. 

When you take responsibility and realize that you've been choosing to date losers, you understand that it's entirely up to you to raise your standards when it comes to dating.

Stop blaming others for your lack of success and starting figuring out what you need to do in order to shake things up.

You refuse to invest in yourself

People are always fearful when it comes to "investing" their money. If they're thinking about investing their money in stocks, a business, or some other venture, they're always fearful of losing their money. 

Even with that being said, these same people who throw their money into something where they have no control will refuse to invest any money in themselves. 

Investing in yourself is one of the few things you actually have control over! When you invest money in yourself, you have complete control over the return on that investment.

The only time people seem to be gung-ho about investing in themselves is when they borrow ridiculous amounts of money to go to college. These same people will invest tens of thousands of dollars on an undergrad degree, but they won't pay a couple hundred dollars to work with a career coach. 

People will spend almost $100,000 on an MBA in the HOPES of landing a better job, but won't pay $200 for a professional to write their resume. People have been investing in bitcoin like crazy, but a lot of these same people scoff at the idea of paying $50 for a book to learn about investing in real estate.

Investing in yourself is the absolute BEST investment you will ever make because it has the highest rate of return. One of the absolute best investments I ever made was a 3 day seminar on NLP.

As a natural introvert, learning how to communicate with people better has paid many dividends, and it's been incredible for my coaching business.

  • You can invest in yourself in lots of different ways. If you want to become better at speaking, you can pay for a speaking course or attend Toastmasters.    
  • You can start reading more books, attending workshops and conferences,  or hire a coach. By investing in yourself, you're sending a powerful message to yourself  that you truly believe in your ability to succeed.

If you're struggling with feeling stuck and you know you aren't living up to your true potential, let's work together and figure out what's holding you back from success!


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