Article Everybody needs support, so don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. 1 2014 Life coaching https://www.lifecoachhub.com/img/uploads/articles/thumbs/384_1661887716.jpg Stress management coaching life coaching Lifecoachhub Pty Ltd LifeCoachHub

We All Need Support

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TAGS: coaching, life coaching, business coaching, coach, life coach, self help, personal development stress reduction, support, support network, we all need support
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We all need support sometimes.

START WITH YOU, AND THEN BUILD YOUR SUPPORT NETWORK AROUND YOU

No matter what issue or struggle you are facing, the place to start is always the same - YOU.

We can't change other people and we can't always expect them to change. We can't stop the issue that's already occurring in your life. It's happening and that's a fact of reality now, even though it's hard. 

But what we can change is YOU. How you are handling the current issues. What you can do differently this time to handle the hurts and pain and make these kinds of issues stop.

Personal development is about developing and growing you so that you have the support and tools you need to face the challenges and issues life throws at you. So let's start by thinking about building a support network around you...

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WE ALL NEED SUPPORT

None of us knows everything - and we're not supposed to. There is no shame in needing help or wanting new information or admitting we don't know everything. Humans are tribal creatures and we're meant to be that way.

We resolve our issues by working them out - together - in community - with support. That's how we are naturally made to be. 

If you grew up in a non-supportive environment or were taught somewhere along the way that natural tribal support was somehow wrong or made you less of a person - you were taught wrong. And that's where you begin. 

Let go of any stigma or guilt or shame or condemnation associated with needing other people to help. It's who you are naturally. It's who we all are naturally.

And the people who told you that needing support was wrong or bad may not be living to their best anyway. They may be struggling just like you and not be able to share that with you.

So you thought they were an expert, but really, they're hurting too. And somewhere along the way, they put that hurt on you - telling you that you shouldn't need help or just be stronger or toughen up or be a man. But the truth is, strength comes from knowing who you really are.

THINK OF ALL THE WAYS WE SUPPORT EACH OTHER

Each of us is limited in some area of life. None of us can do everything. So we do need each other. And to run around telling each other that it's wrong to have that need - is, frankly, silly. 

I would hope, that if I needed some piece of knowledge or information you gained from your experiences, you'd provide that to me.

Don't you do that in your life every day?

  • At work, people ask you questions - they need your help - with something you know that they don't. Are they weak for asking?
  • Are your kids weak when they ask?
  • What about the neighbors or people in your church group? Are they weak or somehow less than because they admitted they needed you?

So, if there is no shame for them to admit to needing you - why do you hold such a hugely different stance for yourself? We are often so hard on ourselves.

*****

Let your coach know what emotions you're experiencing from having read through this. Let them know what thoughts were triggered and what responses you've had. It will help them to give you some tools and coach you through letting go of the superman / wonder woman thoughts you've developed in your life.

Photo Credit : Penn State

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COMMENTS

  • JP33
    May 08, 2014

    Thanks Julie. I have always been worried about seeming too "needy." My father taught me when growing up that asking for things was ... wrong or something. I love the way you describe it as "natural tribal support"... It's liberating to see it that way. It's like, it's not me who's weak or wrong, but as a human race, we all need each other's support!!

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